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10 Tips for Writing Your Own Wedding Vows

Writing your own original wedding vows can be a way to ensure that your vows express your exact sentiment. Many vows commonly used in weddings are very lovely and express your love for each other but they are usually not specific to the couple. While it is not necessary to write your own vows, many couples opt to do so in order to make sure that the vows that they recite at the wedding are meaningful to them as a couple. It is not important that you be an eloquent writer to write beautiful wedding vows. What is important though is that you write from your heart. This will ensure that your vows express your feelings adequately and in a way that your partner will understand. Here are 10 tips for writing your own wedding vows:

Bridal Couple Walking Down the Aisle Outdoors

1. Make sure that both you and your partner are committed to reciting original vows. Many couples are not comfortable expressing something so personal in front of others. While the love that is expressed in pre-written vows is also personal, it does not leave the couple feeling so vulnerable. There are plenty of existing vows available and a couple should realize that they are free to use these existing vows and are under no obligation to write their own vows.

2. Once you have decided that you would like to write your own wedding vows you might want to consider whether or not you want your vows to have a theme or themes. Love is sure to be an underlying theme in any vow but you may also want to incorporate other ideas in your vows as well. Virtues of trust, understanding, friendship and honesty may be a few themes that you may want to include in your vows.

3. Make sure the vows are written well before your wedding date. It is important not to procrastinate with writing your vows because if you put it off until the night before the wedding you are likely to become stressed out and have a great deal of difficulty writing your vows. Writing your vows well in advance of your wedding helps to eliminate stress and allows you time to really think about what you want your vows to say to your partner.

4. Writing your own wedding vows can be difficult. The most difficult part of writing your own wedding vows is just getting started. Chances are that once you get on a roll you will be able to write freely but getting started can be difficult. For this reason, you may choose to read through a number of existing vows. This will help you to get a feel for the language that is used in vows and can give you some ideas about how you want your vows to read.

5. Make a list of all the things that you love and admire about your partner. You might want to create this list and then set it aside for a few days before you begin writing your vows. When you are ready to start working on your wedding vows, you could read the list that you had previously written to remind you of all the wonderful characteristics your partner possess and to get you really thinking about your partner.

6. Make sure that you have plenty of quiet time to work on your vows when you do sit down to start writing them. This may be a long arduous process and it is important to allow plenty of time to write your vows. If you know that you have an appointment in less than an hour, it's probably not a good time to start working on your wedding vows.

7. Considering co-writing your vows with your partner to achieve meaningful vows for both of you. You may choose to write your vows completely on your own to ensure that they are a surprise for your partner but you may also wish to work on your vows with your partner so that the two of you can enjoy the process of writing your vows together. This can be a wonderful opportunity to reminisce and remember the good times that you have shared.

8. When writing your wedding vows, avoid talking about any bad experiences. While you may wish to include these to demonstrate how you and your partner have persevered and overcome many obstacles, this type of talk can be upsetting to your partner and your guests. Sticking to the happy memories helps to make the vows more light-hearted and does not make them any less meaningful.

9. It is also important to not worry about the length of your vows. You may feel compelled to shorten a long drawn out vow because you feel as though it may bore those in attendance or you may feel as though you need to add onto vows that are concise but this is not necessary. All that truly matters is whether you think you have adequately conveyed the desired sentiment in your vows.

10. Don't be afraid to use language from a song that is special to you and your partner as a couple. Chances are that the two of you enjoy a meaningful song because it is symbolic of your relationship. In this situation it is appropriate to recite a portion of the lyrics as part of your vows.

Writing original wedding vows can be difficult but many couples believe that original vows are more meaningful than pre-existing ones. Following the tips above will help to make the vow writing process a little easier by providing you with a few basic guidelines for writing your vows. It is important to remember that original vows are not obligatory and that it is perfectly acceptable to use existing or traditional vows if you choose to do so.

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